Job vs. Military

I'm officially fed up.
I'm fed up with my mom treating me like shit.
I'm fed up with that shit community college.
I'm fed up with not having a job.
I'm fed up with not having a car.
I'm fed up with being fat.
I'm fed up with guys.
And I'm fed up with bitching about everything. ;-;

SO! It's time for a change. :D
I'm giving everything 120% now. If I can't find a ride somewhere, I'm taking the bus. If I can't purchase a membership at a gym to work out, I'll do it all at home on my own. If I can't get my mom to stop bitching, I'll ignore her. If I can't get these guys off my ass, I'm changing my phone number. And if I can't find a job, I'm joining the military. [And if I can't get the taste of asparagus out of my mouth, I'm shooting myself. ;-;]

That's right.
Military.

Because in all honesty, I have nothing holding me here. I would already be in the military if it wasn't for one simple thing.
I'd like to see the man I love. And if I join the military, I'll never see him.

Sure, we only see each other once a year, but it's better than NEVER.

See, this is what I hate about guys and relationships. They hold me back. ;-;

*sigh*

At least I have a bit of time to make my decision, find other alternatives.
And in the mean time, I get to scare the shit out of my mom with the entire military ordeal.
She knows I want to move out and start a life. A LIFE. But no, anytime my life pursuing involves her driving me around in MY TRUCK, it's the end of the world.
Fuck.

Fuck fuck fuck.

I'm going to force her to teach me to drive stick tomorrow. And if she refuses, I'll have Chris do it. :]

But with either choice I make, I'm going to have to start getting rid of a lot of my crap. A LOT.
Hmmm, yard sale perhaps? :o

Chyeah, good luck with that. ._. I'm such a pack rat it's not even funny. And my mom is 10x worse than me. I go to throw out a bunch of stuff I don't want, and she has to whine and cry about it and throw it back in my room.

:/
:|
:[

This blows.

Anyway, off to do some epic Psychology homework, then I'm going to take one of these nifty sleepy pills. :D

Then tomorrow, I'm hopping on that damn bus to go out and do some hardcore job searching. No more moping around just because my mother doesn't want to take me. I'll show her.

*FLEX!*

Valentine's Day. :/

Well, this morning started off on the right foot, I think. Banging on the door and whatnot. I opened the door only to be faced with a dozen beautiful roses. I wasn't sure what to think at first, then I realized who they were from.

*sigh* I couldn't help but feel guilty. Whereas my mother started to bitch and mope around the house while blaring the most depressing music you could ever think of. It was really getting on my nerves. Especially her smart-ass remarks about the roses and everything Valentine's related. I tried to cheer her up, but there's no use. And as soon as she saw me getting dressed and putting on all my make-up, she got even more irate thinking I was going to leave the house.

It seems like every holiday is like this. Wait, no, EVERY DAY IS LIKE THIS. I get the guilt trip for having a life, so I try to restrict my plans... it blows. I want to kick something, but I can't. v.v

I would have gone to the movies or whatever Pappe had in mind if it wasn't for the taunting and crap I was going to get once I returned home. I've grown tired of it, so i suppose the best thing I can to is stay at home.

I also received a Valentine's gift from Luke. xD It was a bunch of job applications from around town. :p So, I was pretty thankful for that since my mother has a problem with leaving the house at anytime. She still has yet to teach me how to drive stick. >:[ I don't think she understand the fact that if she taught me to drive it, I could go do things on my own.

... or maybe she understands it completely and just doesn't want me leaving.

Fuck.

Well, I'm going to try and enjoy the rest of my day laying around the house and eating junk food.
Hope your days go well.

I was finally able to hook up the stereo to my truck today... only to have it stop playing at random times. :/ It's rather quite annoying, but I suppose I should have just paid someone to deal with this crap.

Sigh.

Then again... it isn't really my truck anymore. I've already made plans with my mother and how she's going to repay me. :] $900 worth of tattoos, FTW! Then later on, I'll buy my own car and drive everyone around. We be lookin' like Pee-imps. x]

College is boring. I've failed my midterms... but I know I'll pass every class. lol. That place is a joke. I can't wait to get my life on track, get a job, then transfer to a more serious college. Maybe even OIT. Or perhaps something far far away. :o! The world may never know!

I'm going to scope out the 'net... or I might just go clean... who knows, mang.

Bye.

I have decided!

To start writing a blog. :D And thanks to Kayleen, I shall be using this site.

I need to start writing my life adventures out anyway, they're pretty fuckin' epic imo.

Makes me rather sad that I forget about them and can't share them with the rest of the world. ;-;

Anyway, I'm going to look for a fucking job now.

Toodaloo motha fucka's!